No School Like the Old School

I believe in looking back only as much as it teaches about the present and the future. What's done is done, money spent is gone, what investment can I make in the future?

So hence you'll rarely, read probably never, see images older than these, unless you are at my house rifling through boxes, which either means I'm sleeping with you or I'm dead. So, excluding those two, these are about as old as you'll ever see. (And the only reason you're seeing these is because I had to do some copy work as a favor for a friend, so since it was set-up I figured I'd shot these at the same time.)


These two images are part of a series of six or seven images, the others I need to find, they're in a tube somewhere, of self-portraits. I seem to be a lot of self-portraits lately, so this is a kind of compare and contrast. These images are from when I was 20, in college at U Iowa (Go Hawkeyes!) and very depressed.

I was done, I was cooked, it was time to leave the oven. Believe it or not, I didn't party enough, I was working too hard and just spiraled down and down. Sucked at the time, looking back at the images now, worth it though. These have been some of my favorite images of mine for years.

I look forward to making better images than these, as challenging at it will be to accomplish.


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On a completely different note, Seagrove tea, Wow. Just wonderful, a tint of orange I think, but whatever, it's delicious. My whole body just relaxes drinking this stuff. And the smell while you're brewing it, yummy. I love yummy.

I feel good.

Update on My Pushiness and the Joy of Statcounting

So I either reacted to quickly, which is a trait, I should point out, that I'm not known for, really, never done it before, not a once, I'm a calm pond in a tumultuous ocean. Yep, that's me, calm and cool. (okay, enough self-mockery.) Or someone is using RSS feeds.

So last evening I mentioned some artistic disagreements I had with a performer. Okay, so today some photos were added. Cool.

Now this is where it gets interesting to me, I stat track. I've always been a huge fan of having information and statistics as to what is occurring in whatever I do. In this day and age, information really is power, and I want to know how many people are reading my rambling. That, and I'm self-obsessed, or as I like to like to say, "I'm deeply and dearly loved (mumble by me mumble.)" Or, you can go with, "You can't love and be loved till you learn to love yourself." Though the jokes that follow that statement, well, they last for days, and days, and days.

For those of you who aren't geeks, and let's be honest, geeks rule. Basically what happens is there is a little bit of code made by a company, StatCounter, in all my pages and sites which tell me how many people are visiting, plus some other little tidbits. The "other little tidbits" are pretty interesting though, and really not little.

Some are things that are quite useful, like your monitor resolution. Knowing this helps me make better layout decisions in the future for my web site and blog for better viewing. Cool beans.

I also know what pages get visited most often. (Much to my surprise on my website my Bed Series (warning, my naked butt) is actually kind of popular. Hmmm, wouldn't have guessed, but good, I like that series too.)

I know how people get to my sites. (Shout out to old Blood & Thunder and Zeepie.) If people show up via search terms I know which terms. (Josh Hawkins is the most popular, shocker, but me and Joshua Hawkins are always duking it out for #1 on Google. FYI - Joshua, as far as I can tell, interesting. An "intercessory missionary" out of the International House of Prayer (IHOP, as long as he sees the humor in that and is passionate about what he does, I think we'd get along.))

On the cool to know, and not really revealing most of the time but kind of in my case side, I also know where people are located who are checking out my site, or at least where there ISP is located. (Everyone give a big wave to Ann Arbor Michigan, Dallas Texas and Zagreb Croatia. Yeah, I'm not sure who is in Zagreb, but I'm all about meeting new people, so, "Howdy Zagreb, good to have you. Hope to see you again.") For those who didn't know about this, now you do, you may also want to read here.

Okay so I have all this info, which I like, but then there are RSS feeds. By and large I don't worry about them all that much, most people don't know how to use them (he says to the crowd of IT professionals) and there ain't nothing I can do about it no how.

So why do I mention all of this? Because the change in the images, the timing, I don't know if it's my overly quick reactions or a reaction to what I said. The stats would suggest it was unlikely the performer read any of this, but then there are RSS feeds and I believe the performer is probably fairly tech savvy. Hmmm....which is it?

At this point, I believe I need to get a life if this is what I'm thinking about. Ah well, it's an actual sit at home day off. I also don't like to feel pushy, or at least indirectly pushy, directly pushy is fine though. Anyhow...off to getting kids fat, because it's better than getting me fat.

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And on a completely unrelated note, Cave of the Golden Buddha (tea), not such a huge fan. Decent, but not great, and I always want Great, with a capital "G". But I have developed a consistent method for brewing that is working pretty well for me. 185F, as per the instructions, a quick wash of the tea in the pot. Basically poor in enough water to cover the leaves then empty. Let the leaves stand for 1:11 to let the residual water soak in and open up the leaves. Poor water in, preferably from 2-3 feet above the pot to agitate the leaves. Let stand for 2:22. Empty and drink. 2nd infusion, repeat, let stand 3:33. The third infusion I'm still working on as I don't often do 3 infusions (36 ounces of tea right before bed, it creates issues about 2 hours later) but currently I'm letting the 3rd infusion stand for 5:55. That seems to be working pretty good. The 2nd infusion is almost universally the best tasting, sometimes by a wide margin, but this technique, especially with the pre-wash has really helped bring that first infusion much closer to the 2nd. Did I mention needing a life?

48 Inspiring Hours

I'm an introvert, and a pretty strong one. I generally dislike people. On the other hand the only thing in this world that holds my interest with any regularity is people. The last two days though have reminded me why I love humanity, even on those days I don't, and that ain't today. Today is glowing with love.

First wonderful person. Liala Kuchma, she is one of ten Chicago artists in Chicago's Artists Month Celebration. Okay, neat. It was when she was talking about her weaving at the loom, how she does it for 12 hours a day, sometimes more, because she loves it, when she talked about the choice and which would make her happier, weaving or going out for dinner with friends, and how most of the time more weaving would make her happier, it was when she talked about what she did and you could feel the passion, I could feel the passion, the love, that I just felt...good. It's one of those, "there is someone else out there who feels it too," moments. I don't get many of those.

Many people love something, whatever it is, and that is wonderful, but it is tempered, and wisely so, I'd argue. I'm not wise. I am passionate. Not about many things, but I am about a few, and those areas of my life, I love them. I can feel it, sometimes I can feel it want to rush out. I love it, and I wouldn't stop it. I'm also well aware that it can be very harmful to me in other areas of my life. C'est la vie. (I love that phrase.)

It's rare I get to meet a person so devoted to their art. I like those people. Maybe they just make me feel less alone, in a way that being with people can never make me feel not alone.

The second cool person was Ryan. Ryan I don't think knows quite how cool he is yet. That's fine, a little sad, but we all have to learn. Ryan was just a joy to talk to. He was discovering the joy of passion, of creating, of, of I don't know what. But he was discovering. He had that sound, that look of young love. I love young love, that falling in love. Mature, caring, healthy love has it's place in the world (though whether I can make this argument from experience is an interesting question these days) but young love, whether youthful in years, or new to us today, is wonderful, powerful. When the grass is greener, the sky is bluer, and you just don't know any better, but it's wonderful. I don't know if he'll get through the hard stuff. He's already gone through quite a bit personally, and has more to face, and he has my admiration and respect for it, but there is more ahead, and I wish him the best in it. I don't know how he'll do, but I love that he is in love, and I hope he can enjoy that. And through his love of love, he's reminded me of how much I love it too. And for that, I owe him a thanks, and I only hope I was able to give him a tenth as much as he gave me.

It didn't hurt that he and his friends all thought I was cool, had a cool job and reminded how lucky I am in life. Sometimes it just feels really good to remember, to be grateful, for all you've had the luck to be given in life.

As a side note, I meet Ryan at Guess Hookah. Cool place. Bummer I'm apparently about a decade older than their average clientèle, I'd think about hanging there every now and again. Nice laid back atmospheres, a nice change of pace for me. Sometimes I wish I didn't find stress and chaos so damn fun. It actually made me kinda want to try a hookah, alas, my brain won, and I didn't. Apparently 85% of people who go there and use the hookahs don't smoke cigarettes, who would've thunk it? Not to mention, if you're twenty, reading this and male or lesbian, beautiful women galore, I mean....wow. Okay, that was unprofessional of me.

And just to add to the surreality of today. Other than hookah cafes I was covering a gentleman, nice guy, Darrin Hallowell, who does sculpture incorporating his own blood. Pretty interesting stuff, interesting ideas, and enjoyable to talk to.

I wish more Tuesdays could just be artists doing something odd and hookahs. That really is what Tuesday is supposed to be.

As a side note, I don't know why it seems everything I've shot is moving left, but....oops, my poor graphic designers.

And on a final pointless note, white teas, can't get into them. Just can't. I'm about the Oolongs.

He's Mr. Vain

So tonight I was faced with the question that man (or woman) has asked since the start of time, now that I've had an enjoyable Friday evening (also known as grocery shopping and a movie on my tv after work was done) what should I do, and I just happen to have "fun hair" happening and a small mountain of photo equipment handy? (Everything about this entry, I should say, is about laughing at me and how it is totally allowed.)

I should also state here, Lexi is a Goddess, officially. She is now Lexi the Great and Everlasting Goddess of Hair. (BTW - I know I need to get my highlights done, and I know it's ridiculous that I know this.)

Some day I'm going to go on about the difference between fun and happy and their minimalist relationship many days. Some day I'm also going to get a life and not hang out on Friday nights taking wacky self-portraits, but that day is not today. And I had a lot of fun and am damn happy.

And if you think this is bad, there's another 100 or so of these that are even weirder. Which raises the question, what does a man with a small mountain of photo equipment do on a Saturday night? (And welcome to how you become legally married to do what you do.) Also, I'm replacing all my various profile photos with the one above I think, to hell with reality I say. To hell with it.

This blog used to once involve matters of journalism and photography. Oh well.


BTW - I'm going to randomly start mentioning teas because....I feel like it. Wen Shan Bao Zhong, absolutely excellent. The second steeping of it is absolutely delicious, delicious. Not to mention it's from Formosa, and who calls it Formosa anymore, well except for the Chinese? On the other hand, I doubt drink 36 ounces of right before bed is wise. It doesn't have much caffeine in it as far as I can tell, but that's a lot of liquid.